ahzeezee.blogspot.com

Cashmere Mafia

2008-02-27T05:31:00.002+08:00

I think i just found my new favourite show after Sex in the City - Cashmere Mafia! (All thanks to phreaky for her recommendation)

Cashmere Mafia is about 4 power ladies, their men and their life; and it completely reflects our changing society. I can kinda see my girlfriends in the characters portrayed! and the show leaves you with loads to ponder upon.

Is it worth pitting yourself against your lover for a promotion, at the risk of damaging your relationship? Are you ranking your personal satisfaction higher than the relationship? Why can't men accept women who are more capable than them? Why is it either love or career? How is it that men stray and get away with it because the women have to hold the family together? Shouldn't it be time that the women strike back?

Female power!

Urgh

2008-02-14T08:12:00.002+08:00

I think i've just seen a very horrible side of someone. Perhaps the situation called for it, but i'm still shocked at what i've witnessed.

Even if you're single, there should still be certain limits. I just dun think that you should allow anyone to do that to you, whether single or attached.

Anyway, i dunno if she was upset because i wanted to catch the last bus and i probably spoiled her fun. Next time i will just come and go as i want, and not even bother if she's not home for the night.

1 mth anniversary

2008-02-13T00:23:00.000+08:00

Today shall be the day where i commemorate the 1 mth death anniversary of my possessions - which were lost to a very stealthy thief in the Copenhagen train station.

In case you haven't heard, i've lost my handcarry in Copenhagen on 12th Jan 2008 while eating at Macdonalds in the train station. In it were a whole load of important things, like my laptop, camera and ipod (which is brand new!!) plus some paperwork and travel books. My whole life has been turned upside down, but thankfully it has now returned to normal. Occassionally i still curse that blardy theif who took my things, but i've already pretty much come to terms with it.

Anyway, how i lost my things is kinda like an interesting story. You see, me and this other dude was at Macdonalds, with me queuing up to buy food. (Dun ask me why a girl has to get a GUY food.) and when i came back we were happily eating, with all our belongings on the floor at our feet. At the meantime, we were staring at this bunch of gypsies just outside, because they were crying and hugging each other. Just as we were about to go to our platform for the train, I realised that my bag was missing. It was amazing you know, because the bag was between the both of us on the floor (we were on bar stools) and behind us was this glass panel and the dustbin. Now comes the question: Was it taken while i was away buying food? or Was it taken when we were staring at the gypsies? My parents seem to think that its the former, but i guess i'll not blame anyone. Everything happens for a reason, and i'm sure losing my bag (as much as it was a painful experience) must have happened to teach me a lesson.

So yes, its a big big lesson learnt.
I've learnt never to trust anyone unless they're your family and close friends.
I've learnt never to be complacent in a foreign environment.
I've learnt to make the best out of every situation and not to dwell on unhappy things.

Despite this horrendous start to my exchange here, I am glad to say i'm still enjoying my time here. Sweden is indeed a beautiful country, and i love how the Swedes can very easily switch between Swedish and English without any hesitation. I've never heard a car honk here, and they give way to you even though you are jay-walking. People here are courteous and nice, even though they are rather shy at the start.

I'm gradually getting used to the weather, which is at the same time getting better as we approach Spring. It's interesting to see how the days are getting longer. When i arrived in Copenhagen in Jan, the sun would set at 3pm. But now, we have sun till about 5pm. Speaking of which, i realised how important sunlight is in our lives! I become so happy when the sun is shining (which is pretty rare here) and now i know i took the sunhine in singapore for granted.

This whole exchange has been a good experience so far; and as much as i'm learning about other people's cultures, i'm also learning more and more about myself as the days pass. I like doing that, because i want to be at peace with myself...

So far, my interaction has pretty much been with Asians...partly because the accomodation i live in is really quiet (like no parties, etc) and partly because of the CNY celebration. There are many many Asians here, from sg alone there are already 12. Many are also from HK, and i like being around them, probably because they are friendly and they have high energy levels. :) I am still looking forward to hanging out with more ang mohs and getting drunk as the days pass (pls dun tell my parents that!!), but we will see what happens!

V-day is approaching! For those of you with a partner, enjoy that very special day! For those of you without, dun worry, you can date me! :) We can wine and dine on the webcam. muuuahahaha...

Jag bor i Sverige!

2008-02-08T07:38:00.000+08:00

I'm alive and in Sweden! :)

just wanted to share this lovely story (thanks to GJ)...go look at the link!
http://singaporedreaming.com/blog/?q=node/6

Promise to update soon!!

My favourite time of the year!

2007-12-30T22:14:00.000+08:00

I looooveeeee New Years! Sure, there are no catchy new year songs or elaborate decorations, but i like celebrating the new year because it symbolises a brand new start to things; its like being able to wipe the slate clean (albeit imaginary-ly). It also represents so much hope as we all set our resolutions for the coming year, while reflecting on the year that is about to be over.

Here goes: my reflections for the year 2007!

I realise how much i love my family.

Kinship will never fail you; and there's nothing you'll want more than going home to warmth after a really bad day.

Happy times with my baby.

Lots of things happened this year for us, and we've grown to understand each other a lot better. Nobody else reads my mind better than him, which explains why i have such a hard time surprising him! :) There were naturally the usual conflicts every couple has, but every conflict has made our relationship stronger. We rock!

2007 will be remembered as the year i unofficially completed school.

On 1st December i wrote my last exam in SMU (crossing fingers real hard that nothing goes wrong on exchange), bringing my time there to an end. I've loved school, despite how crazily busy it can get; and i know i will always miss going for classes, the GSRs, library, friends...

Hopes dashed and renewed again.

This year i've learnt to take things in my stride and smile when things do not turn out the way i want them to be. How i've got Sweden after HK failed to materialize is a blessing in disguise... because i'm so looking forward to visiting the land of Volvo, Saab, Tetra-Pak, Alfred Nobel and Ikea! Same thing goes for career options where the road ahead looks kinda misty, but it doesn't mean that i will just stop in my tracks and whine.

I actually like accounting.

hahah yes! i actually enjoyed the modified semester and all my monster accounting modules, which surprised myself. Maybe some things are hidden beneath the surface, and will only appear at the right time!

Traveling rocks!

Nothing is more fulfiling than traveling because going to foreign places opens your eyes to really a lot of things. Some make us realise how wonderful home is, while others show us how we could learn from them. The world is so big, and its really up to us to explore it. :)
So there you have it, my reflections for the year. 2008 is going to be a great one! Happy New Year everyone!

On Love Actually

2007-12-28T21:21:00.000+08:00

After watching last night's re-run of the show, i finally understand why you like Love Actually.
Because...

Love does not discriminate.
Love encompasses friendship and kinship.
Love is forgiving.

and most importantly...
Love overcomes all obstacles.

I love you!

13 days

2007-12-26T20:52:00.000+08:00

Yeap, that's how fast time flies and how soon i'll be leaving.

The world is huge and i am all set to explore it!

Of course i will miss all you people back home, especially my family. But 6 months will be over before we know it, and i'll be home again, wiser and more independent! :)

30 days

2007-12-11T12:10:00.000+08:00

In another 30 days i will be on another continent, approx 5987 miles away from home, away from the people who has always been here for me when i needed them, but nearer to the person i love.

Loads to look forward to, but with that anticipation comes a wee bit of apprehension - Will i really be independent enough to see myself through this? Will faith guide me along? Many many unknowns, but i guess i am ready for this journey, on which i will get to know myself better, have a little more faith in everything and stop being so cynical. :)

Another 30 days left to cherish everyone here before i see them again in another 6 months time...Swedennn i am coming!!

hey there!

2007-12-07T23:22:00.000+08:00

hellooo folks!

its been close to a month since i've updated, so here goes:

this wacko sem is finally over, with all projects done and exams written. I've also finally finished my last exam of my life (kind of, if you exclude the exams i'll have in Sweden) and couldnt have been any happier!

BUT, this was my last sem in the SMU campus. So i'm rather sad. sighhhh...i think i'm seriously gonna miss school, the GSR, the company, and the chao muggers who congregate in the library. haha!

ZR has since left for Germany...and i'm learning to cope with his absence. I am super duper glad for webcam and skype, hahah...cause i am always loads happier after chatting with him. I never knew that i could miss someone THAT MUCH, but now i know. Love you baby!!

My sis and Grandma is still not back from their hols in the US of A, so that means i'm all alone at home while everyone is at work! hahah... i'm kinda appreciating the ability to nuah all day, stream tudou and talk to my wall. wheeeee!

Christmas and New Year is getting closer and closer, so its time again to reflect on the current year. i'm going to sit down and think about life again, and give thanks to the many wonderful people and things that happened to me. :)

will update again!

hold mama's hand, boys!

2007-11-06T21:59:00.001+08:00

I was walking home from the train station this evening when i saw this guy holding his old mama's hand as they were walking together...so sweet right!! when was the last time i held my parents' hands? watching the 2 of them hold hands while chatting away really kinda melted meeeeee.

so guys, hold your mama's hands alright! its a gesture that all girls appreciate, cause if you can / are willing to take care of your mum, we know you will take care of us. :)

GE Women's Run

2007-10-21T17:20:00.000+08:00

I'm a happy girl! hahaha...am done with the Women's 5K run, and it was a damn fun experience! i din know my legs could take me so far...haha. and it was nice running with loads of other people on a nice sunday morning, and the sights along the way were so beautiful!

i want to do it again next year!

The family

2007-10-10T20:35:00.000+08:00

2007-10-04T12:43:00.000+08:00

It saddens me that the situation in Myanmar has escalated to such proportions. Thousands arrested and dozens shot...sigh. well i guess we should all be glad that we live in a country were there's democracy and peace... and realise that there are other more important things in life than just money and status and the other meaningless things - one of which being my shitty presentation.

I honestly think that this presentation was easily one of the worst i've done...and to be honest i am disappointed. Terina i kinda get what you're saying about your grp mates...

Anyway looking on the brighter side of things, next week is break week! Later in the afternoon i will have my last class of the week and half of the sememster will officially be over. It just hit me that this will be the last sem i'll be spending on this campus - no more booking rooms, buying milo at pick and bite, eating at underground kopitiam, walking to school, mugging in the library till late, being close to timbrenational museumasiancivilisationmuseumrafflescityplazasingapura...well it makes me sadddddd. As much as i complain about being busy with school work, i know i will miss my schooling days.

I have another half a semester to fully soak in the SMU atmosphere! Am going to make school my second home, muuuahahahahha!

Accountants are sexy this year!

2007-09-28T14:05:00.000+08:00

Calling all soon to be graduates - You're going to find this article damn interesting!

Weekend with Joannaaaaaaa

2007-09-25T21:59:00.000+08:00

Photos of our weekend escapade with Jo

(the star of the day because shes leaving on thurs. SOBSSSSS)

Our dinner at some hainanese chicken rice stall. The others were late (read: as usual) so the 3 of us had to suffer stares from the neighbouring tables cause we ordered so much!!

See Jo's very disgruntled look - better not be late next time har!!

The party then moved to Icekimo - the very yummy ice cream shop along Thomson Road! Thats us choosing our ice creammmmm :)

Let me see if i can get the flavours right: Black sesame, Durian, Snickers, Nutella, Belgium Chocolate...shit i can't remember the last flavour!

For some reason, all the guys that day were wearing caps!

Shall end this off with this picture of Jo - Ms cyclops! hahahaah...

Headache

2007-09-25T00:02:00.000+08:00

School is starting to be a pain in the butt... with everyone i know saying that week 5 feels more like week 12 and 13 than any other semester. I seriously dunno what's so different about this sem! To think that I truly believed nothing can beat mod term. sighhhhhhhh.

As if school and projects and case presentations are not enough, this also happens to be the job applications time of the year. The time to fill up endless forms and write countless cover letters, followed by anxiously waiting for offers. ARGHHHHHHHH. As i am writing this, i have still yet to compose my cover for the Big 4 applications, whose deadlines are this THURSDAY. :(((((((( And i still can't really make up my mind as to whether i should start my career at a bank or at an accounting firm.

My head feels like it will burst one day, with all my brain juice spilling all over the place. I dun want to do work, dun want to apply for job, dun want to have a career. I feel tired even before working already. yeeekkkssssssss.

Seriously can't wait for Sweden.

scaryyy!!!!!

2007-09-15T16:31:00.000+08:00

I just got home from the world's scariest (at least to me) three point turn! Was fetching my sis over to my aunts at shunfu and had to get myself out of the tight carpark, so i attempted to make a three point turn by going head first into a parking lot and reversing myself out. nice and sweet right? Hell no.

I kinda misjudged the space (as usual) between me and the car on my right, so i ended up super near it which made reversing out really really really scary. i basically din know which way to turn, or even how to get myself out of that sticky situation. thank god my sister was with me in the car, otherwise i think i would have just hyperventilated and fainted in the car.

thank goodness for a saviour, which appeared in the form of a friendly uncle who has just driven in and parked his car. so my sis and i shamelessly approached him, told him we were stuck and he agreed to help us out! yayness!!! so we just stood there and watched as he skillfully reversed the car out of the lot (with lots of steering wheel action). thank goodnesssss. its nice to be rescued and i'm damn grateful to the uncle! thankkkkk youuuu!!!!

i think if i put another scratch on my dads car i will be banned from touching it for life. and does anyone know how i can correct my judgement of space????

Yay!

2007-09-07T20:49:00.000+08:00

Land of Ikea, H&M, Vikings, Meatballs!

Here i come!!!

Hanoi photos

2007-09-01T10:28:00.000+08:00

Currently have no time to show more photos, so here are some which i think are symbolic of Hanoi.

School is only into its second week, but i've already been reading like mad. oh welllllll.

Limestone karsts in Halong Bay - the vietnamese say it resembles fighting cocks, but i think they look like a girl kissing a guy. hehe

A typical day on the streets of Hanoi - street barber and tons of motorcycles! your friend here has mastered the art of jaywalking through crazy traffic. :)

more will come when i have time, either that or when i'm not in the mood to do any work!

on love

2007-08-25T22:33:00.000+08:00

I was reading this article on how age is just a number in some 姐弟恋, and how the younger guys like it that the older women are more financially and emotionally independent, as in the guys dun have to 'babysit' these busier women. I think these guys are just wussies. They want to be treated like little boys and be pampered all their lives, first by their mothers, then by their girlfriends and later by their wifes. I mean, sometimes guys just have to step up to the plate and be a man! I dun mean being chauvinistic, i'm talking about the willingness and ability to share the load (emotionally and financially) with their female partners. I just somehow dun think that this kind of disparity in mentality and maturity will withstand time. And I detest the whole idea of guys having to BABYSIT girls. If they're not prepared to commit (of which spending time together is one element), then they should might as well just remain single. As simple as that. :)

ok now comes the disclaimer: this has nothing to do with my relationship okie! :):)

first day at school

2007-08-21T17:43:00.000+08:00

Its the first day of school for me today! and i am going to make an announcement:

I FEEL VERY VERY OLD.

Its like suddenly all the seniors / familiar faces have all been replaced by this bunch of really young looking and wide eyed kids from don't know where. I am still recovering from this shock. And it doesnt help that they just took in the biggest cohort, so that means A LOT of people whom i dun recognise, and in time to come - people whom i will fight for GSRs with.

Suddenly i find myself yearning for the standard routine of work, where there is at least some sense of familiarily. maybe i just need time to get used to school again!

anyway, one of the classes i had today reminded me of comms 101. a lot of writing and being ept in using expressions and being articulate. honestly, i dunno how i'll survive. we will seeeeee.

heard about the govts plan to keep singaporeans working till the age of 65... and that thought is plain scary. i dun want to work till i'm 65...thats like 42 years of working. WAH LIAO EH. and chances of me being 65 and cleaning the tables at hawker centre / serving up fries at McDees are higher then me still reigning at the top of the corporate ladder. howwwww? so the conclusion is i shall need to work my ass off while i am young, so i can retire and still be rich and live life without worries.

enough of the whinery. i need to search for textbooks now! :)

Boo!

2007-08-19T00:29:00.000+08:00

Realised its really been a long time since i last blogged, now i'm contemplating chucking this blog away...haha.

Just came back from Hanoi on thursday and have been really tired ever since. Why, i have no clue. Maybe its the weather here, so cool and windy, making so nice to snuggle up in my cozy bed. Maybe its because school is starting and i'm secretly dreading it, so sleep is becoming my temporary solution. :P

Loads of things happened since i last blogged, but i'm just too lazy to recollect the memories and put them into words. Sometimes things are probably better left in the head. hehe... maybe when i'm feeling less lazy the words and pictures will come!

Krabi Day 1

2007-07-17T23:08:00.000+08:00

Many photos ahead!

Krabi Day 1 - we landed in Krabi on 01/07/07 at about 7.30pm local time, thanks to this bunch of drunk dudes who were so rowdy on the turn-around tiger flight that the police had to be called in for investigations, hence holding back our flight to Krabi. Hmm, i kinda like the budget terminal as well, the entire no fuss no frills concept... but i just dun understand why the route to the boarding gates resemble hospital corridors so much! And for first timers to the budget airport, dun rush to grab a bite at Hans which is located at the check in counters. There are actually plenty more shops / cafes inside the terminal!
This is us at the Sheraton Hotel. :) A very very nice place! The hotel staff are the most hospitable ones i've met and they made us feel at home immediately. My sis actually said she wants to stay in the Sheraton forever. haha...The hotel has a 'pet' elephant as well! She greets guests very morning at the porch and then proceeds to swim with guests in the sea after that!

The next morning when we officially started our tour of Krabi with our rented car and managed to find this really nice 'garden' restaurant Ruen Mai near Krabi Town.

This was kinda like the highlight of our trip - climbing 1237 steps to get to a Buddha statue at the top of a mountain! Just look at how steep the steps were...but the view was worth the effort!

This is us at the top! haha...i am glad my parents are still fit enough for this. :) and in fact they're even fitter than me and my sis, given that they could descend so much faster than us the scary cats.

More photos to come!

Hey!

2007-07-11T20:55:00.000+08:00

I'm back from Krabi! actually i've been back for about a week, i'm just rather lazy so that explains the delayed blogging.

Krabi was great! It was good time spent with the family, its been ages since the 4 of us have gone on holiday together. I really like Thailand - the people, the place, the food and the culture. There is something so attractive about thailand that makes visitors want to stay on for good. Maybe its the little villages, the friendly natives, the almost empty roads, the rows of rubber trees, the sandy beaches, the street food, the low cost of living... small wonder my dad wants to retire there when he gets older!

Now its back to real world... one where work takes precedence. Its really hard to describe how i feel about my work at the moment. On one hand its as though as i'm doing mundane administrative tasks, on the other hand i understand that the dept i'm in serves an important function and that my stint there will help me understand how another aspect of the bank functions. Banks are not just all about investment banking after all. oh wells, can't quite figure it out yet. My boss has left for germany today...which leaves me myself and i to man the department. I just hope that things will all turn out fine!

Photos will come on another day!

Great Eastern Women's 10K

2007-06-26T21:09:00.000+08:00

Anybody wants to do the Great Eastern run with me and phreakyyyyy? We're most likely doing the 5K fun run. Think we're going to leave the 10K for Stanchart run. haha! see here for details!

Updates!

2007-06-23T21:21:00.000+08:00

Updates! :)

I finally got my much needed hair cut at the same salon at Holland Village. hahah...thanks to crystal babe who agreed to go with me, otherwise i think i wouldn't have dragged my lazy ass to far away holland v just for a hair cut. Anyway, the hair is super short now, with bangs. I think i look like a little girl! hahaha..but it feels good to be young! I kinda like my hair now!

Started work at the bank on monday...and its really been hell of a week. I'm now in a department doing something that is not part of my original job scope. Its a long story but i think this experience will teach me how to handle interpersonal relationships a whole lot better. I need to prepare myself for the challenge and the expectations that i have to meet. Wish me luck!

oh yes! i bought my new camera! hahaha...happy happy! its a sony (yes i know i swore i'll never buy a sony again) which is very pretty and efficient... all the photos you see here are taken using my new baby.

Next sunday i'll be off to Krabi with my family...its really been ages since the 4 of us have gone on holiday together. So i'm really looking forward to that!

photos ahead!

our girly meeting on tuesday at soup spoon and later coffee club. :) My photography skills have improved hor? hahaha

This was my attempt at being artistic...taken while waiting for the girls who ended work late. I really want to go visit the nice places in Singapore to snap photos! anybody wants to go with meeeee?

Big bear bear with me! :) see my new haircut? like kiddo horrrrr? but i kinda like it now!

Presents from my big bear!!! hehehehe....the most wonderful tasting pocky ever (and probably the most expensive) :) you guys should go give it a try...although i dunno where to buy it. hehe...

on a side note, i read an article in Biz Times on my former conductor Chan Tze Law...reminded me of my NJ string orch days...ok this is a random post. hahaha..sorry its saturday night boredom..hehehe!

eeeeyyyyerrrr!

2007-06-13T12:27:00.000+08:00

I am officially in a pissy mood today. Thanks to this moron who keeps bugging me to help him look for an internship. I am not Ontrac okie! Go and look for your own blardy internship lah! I've already wrote an email to my boss on your behalf and if shes not replying there's nothing else i can do. So just get out of my face and stop bugging me EVERY DAMN DAY. I dun owe you anything! If you want something from me, you better be NICE. Nobody is obligated to help your sorry ass.

ok i just had to word vomit that out. I dun get it you know, how some people think that other people MUST help them. I mean, lets just grow up and face it. If you're not my close friend, there is just a limit as to how far i will go for you. Dun you dare treat you like a pushover and ask for A and B like i owe you something. Just pisses me off big time you know.
ok enough of the whinning! i show you guys photos!

My birthday lunch! mummy!
Bear bear's beef redang at PS Cafe
Soup of the day
My beef ragout!

the super yummy orange hazelnut crunch cake!

At China Club courtesy of tax planning prof

pretty lanterns!

the skyline from China Club at Capitol Tower

at dinner with the girls last night! with my present!!!

grumpy baloooo and I

Angsty girls! haha

Idol!

Tiffy and I!

Free like a bird

2007-06-10T17:59:00.000+08:00

I am finally officially freeeeeeeeee! YAY! I feel liberated, having not to think about anything at all. Just being frivolous is good at times! haha.

Here are my plans / to-do for the week:
- Clean up my room a little
- Finish up my Europe trip scrapbook (which is lonnngggg overdue)
- Spend time with my grandmama
- Go for haircut!
- Watch Ocean's 13 and Shrek 3 with bear bear
- Search for new camera
- Sit at a coffee house and read my book all day long
- Meet all my friends and make merry!
- Watch my tvb dramas online. haha!

So much to look forward to! I'm a happy girl.

Was at NTUC with my mummy just now and we saw this dude in his pyjamas. at like freaking 430pm. What a joke leh! hahaha... try guessing his nationality! And i bought the recyclable bag! so that when we go grocery shopping in the future, we will be able to save the environment by reducing the number of plastic bags handed out! You guys should all go buy a bag and give it to your mums... make an effort to save the earth!

The Pasar Malam days

2007-06-06T16:58:00.000+08:00

I'm halfway to the end with only 2 more papers to go! Yay! These days i am starting to adopt a heck care attitude towards exams. Just try my best and i'll be satisfied. Afterall the learning process is definitely more than the final exam grade.

I truly enjoyed this sem. Maybe because this sem's mods are all "big-picture" modules and i like big pictures. hehe... or maybe because as bear bear said, i am made to be an accountant because i am merticulous and anal. I am taking it as a compliment. Haha!\

Updates about the birthday weekend: for once i really had not much mood for celebrations, who has when exams are round the corner? But i did have fun thanks to everyone!

Sat night was spent at PS cafe with bear bear, then we drove around to explore parts of singapore which i never knew existed! Was fun! I felt a little like being in Europe, except of course if it were Europe we would never have been driving. We would be walking our little asses off. I finally experienced Jurong Hill. hahah...this quite nonsense hill in Jurong facing Jurong Island. There was this little park with trees planted by famous people. Guess who these people were? I'll give you a prize if you could name me one of these famous tree planters! haha... oh and Gabriel! i finally know why you like to go to Sungei Buloh liao! Cause your camp is so damn near lah...haha. No wonder. I have pictures of our little escapade, will post them up later after my idiotic exams okie!

oh yes, the reason for the title of the post. There's a pasar malam set up just at the bus stop at my place this week as well as rides (ferris wheel, mini roller coaster) being set up at the big Bishan fied near MOELC. They made me think of those days when we were still kids, when me and my sister would pester anyone we could to bring us downstairs to take a walk. Then we would go through all the stalls selling stickers and all the other girly stuff. Then ask for candy floss (those which came in an amazingly big bag). For some strange reason, i remember the mattress stalls too, maybe because i still can't figure out who in the right mind would buy a mattress off a road side stall. I miss those days, when the pasar malam symbolised fun and a mini shopping spree for us. I feel old!

ok its back to the books for now, before i really regret not spending more time with them. haha...can't wait for friday!

From Zhen haoooooo!

2007-06-02T12:24:00.000+08:00

From my darling friend zhen hao in motherland! Thanks babe!!! eh how long did you take to draw this without a stylus like phreaky's arh? hehee

My old old old friends!

2007-06-02T11:57:00.000+08:00

To my favourite people in the whole wide world!
Thanks for last night! You guys made me happy! :)

Some friends are there for you no matter what happens... and I'm glad these are the friends I have. They've watched me grow from a geeky short short hair primary school girl to the person i am now. They've seen me cry, laugh, morph into a siao nang... I really appreciate our friendship. It never fails to amaze me that we've been friends for so long already!

I know i can always count on these wonderful people and that we'll be friends till the sky falls down on us! Thanks for everything my friends! As we all start to become busy with our own lives, remember you have a friend in me as well! Am always here for anyone of you! :)

Our date at HK Cafe... My yuen yang which came in a cute cup!

My shi nian peng you! hehe...

The birthday cake which was not supposed to be mine... but can still taste the effort you guys put into it!

The amazing menu with many many many dishes.

Me and Jiejing! My very knowledgable friend! His shirt cute hor..and i dunno why i look so sleepy either.

The resident couple - Kunlei and Veron

The Mega Mango ice thingy we had... which had the tendency to collapse. :)

Back at the coffee shop near my place - with the new drinks. Mel and Jo, bet you haven seen it yet.

Me and Gabriel the kuay chap man! hehe...

These girls

2007-05-31T23:50:00.000+08:00

These girls sure know how to make me happy!

Thanks for all the effort and thanks for coming! :)

It just dawned on me that we din take photos...haha. nvm, next time!

Ah hao! i heard about your idea of wrapping phreaky up in toilet paper and singing me a song! hahaha...that was funny! hurry come back... then we can torture phreaky!

And phreaky! I should have guessed it. hahaha... to think that i wanted to call you and ask you what was it you wanted to tell me that was so serious. haha...

Ah min and Auntie hu! Thanks for taking the time out cause i know we're all up to our necks with books... Thanks babes!

Falling in Love

2007-05-29T17:37:00.000+08:00

Saw this here.
Quite aptly describes how its a big black hole and how sometimes you have no control over where its heading.

Happy Monday!

2007-05-28T10:59:00.000+08:00

Its another Monday! This monday brings me soooo much closer to my exams. Its damn scary. Oh well, not like i've never taken exams before. Just try my best i guess. :)

I'm learning to be happy with the little things around. like these:

They made my day!

The weekend was gggreeeattttt! After finishing my piece-of-shit AMA project on friday, followed by the AT mindmap presentation on Saturday, i really needed a break! So bear bear and I went off to Padang to catch the Spanish dance act which is part of the Singapore Arts Festival. I was impressed! Here's a picture of the human net formed by Singaporean volunteers for those of you who missed it.

I'm impressed by the line-up of this year's arts fest. They're bringing in more foreign acts and it just all sounds damn exciting! I want to watch somethinggggg!

Will end off with photos from a damn long time agooooo...when we met to celebrate the birthdays of the April babies. Am going to hit the books AGAIN!

My new toy!

2007-05-20T10:45:00.000+08:00

I've got a present yesterday from my bear bear!! :))))))

A Lego Racer - the Ferrari 248! Wheeeeeee!

Niceeeee not? :)

We fixed it together!

It reminds me of the Jap show Engine staring Takuya, who zips around the tracks with so much style. I want to watch F1 when they come to Singapore!

Thank you big bear bear for the surprise! I love you!

elitist

2007-05-18T16:00:00.000+08:00

I wonder how many of you read the first page of today's HOME section... which explores the issue of elitism. The author alluded to the fact that it's strange how students these days do not perceive wealth as one of the factors when deciding if someone is an elitist, but rather how factors like how well one performs in school, etc.

I think that is hardly surprising. Haven't we all been told since young that if we dun study hard, we are going to end up sweeping the roads? I must have heard that close to a million times as i was growing up.

Anyway, back to the topic of elitism. Yes i think that to a very large extent, the kind of schools you attend and the grades you get do affect your social standing. People tend to judge your capability on your track record. Did you attend one of those branded schools? Yes??? Then why are your grades like this now? Aiyo, you need to work harder. I think this whole mentality stinks.

It is also perceived that if you speak more english than you speak chinese, then you qualify to be an elitist. Well, erm. I dunno what to say about this. I do agree that there are times (or rather most of the time) when i cant stand those chinese speaking ah lians. There is just something about them that is different. Not just the language of preference, but also mentality, maturity, dressing, etc. I mean i have yet to meet someone who speaks chinese, but is able to hold a conversation beyond TV dramas, actors and clothes. Surely there is more to life than all these right? Maybe i am just being biased, and this led me to shut them out of my circle. Maybe if i had opened up to them, i would realise that they are very very nice indeed.

Which reminds me of this conversation i had with the girls, about how it is so much easier for other girls to be nice because they are not exposed to what the world is really like. Having come from where we've came from, i think we realised how evil and bitchy life can get. In a way it forced us to grow up faster and abandon the innocence i guess.

I am not saying that we should just be evil to everyone. I am just saying that being too nice will get you nowhere in life.

The snack monster

2007-05-16T23:19:00.000+08:00

This is an announcement to the whole wide world:
Your friend here is feeling the effects of PMS and wishes to punch someone (anyone) very very very badly. Any kind volunteers?

I know it is bad to get so affected by the monthly cycle, but its hard when you're feeling bloated, pimply and fat. ROAR! I need to bite somebody!

On a side note, my sister just officially named me the snack monster because of this insatiable craving of mine. hehe...this is another effect of PMS - being eternally hungry because your metabolism is up.

About 3 more weeks of school left and i would have officially completed my third year of studies. Do i feel a whole lot smarter? In actual fact, YES. The discussions in class about the future of auditing and whether a conceptual framework in accounting is necessary has really made me a lot more in tuned to developments of the profession. I truly feel like an accountant now! muahahah!

Oh yes, while i am on the topic of school... I am so going to strangle those stupid groupmates who can't write for nuts. They should just go back to PRIMARY school lah! ARGH!!! Maybe i should just go and eat them up.

The weekend and the week ahead

2007-05-07T18:14:00.000+08:00

It's monday again! At the rate time flies, i think i will be 24 years old next week. hee.

I love the weekends, cause i get to pretend that projects, readings, assignments and reports do not exist.

My weekend started on friday, with the gym date with ter and then wine date with the BSM peeps. It's always good to meet up with them - the wise sensible ones. Haha... makes me wish that we could go back to those BSM days.

Well, actually had plans to meet up with the gang, only to find out like 1/2 hour before the agreed meeting time that it will be cancelled. :( I haven seen those guys in ages. The last time i met them was probably the outing to Bugis to eat steamboat where everyone was LATE. Can we please please please meet up sometime soon?

On the bright side, bear bear and i were in Menotti having dessert when the call came. So we promptly decided to try the pasta as well, since its on 1 for 1 for UOB cardholders. I had a good time with the desserts man! Babes we should really go try it! Very very yummy! Then we spent the rest of the night watching soccer. Watched Man U win Man City.

Most of sunday was spent doing work. yeeekksss! This is what i have due this week:

Monday
AMA critique of a case question; AMA meeting to settle report and forum; AA meeting to settle presentation
Tuesday
AA meeting to rehearse
Wed
AA presentation! and TP meeting
Thurs
TP class which normally stretches all the way till 9pm
Friday
My hot date with the girls! YAY!

I can't wait for the weekend to come!!

A recap of the past weeks

2007-04-29T18:35:00.000+08:00

I'm supposed to be studying... but i'm bored!

The past weeks have really been very eventful. :) Many many long long long meetings...some were nice and productive, others just left me sitting there rolling my eyes. I've been to visit almost all my professors so far, which is really a first. Normally i dun even know where they sit on the 5th floor.

oh the highlights! PHANTOM on 18th Apr, courtesy of my bear bear. :) The show is really amazing - the backdrops, actors, songs, special effects. I loveeed it. If only more of such good acts would come to Singapore! Speaking of which, there's Dim Sum Dollies and A Midsummer Night's Dream coming up next. Anyone?

Then during that same week, i fell sick. I think its due to the lack of sleep...i hardly slept at all throughout the week and had to resort to sleeping pills, and the next thing i knew... i was down with fever.

This week has been a whole lot better. My project (the one which was giving me hell lot of trouble) finally got settled (presentation's tmr!), I am no longer sick, another project was done and over with and i even went shopping!

The next few weeks are filled with more presentations and report deadlines. But i'm taking one step at a time...no point looking so far ahead into the future!

To all my friends who are overseas on internship or exchange, have fun guys!

To the rest of us still here in stuffy Singapore doing internships or just plain slacking, quick come out and have fun with me even though its week 10! :)

i wish

2007-04-24T20:13:00.000+08:00

How i wish i could be someone else, somewhere else right nowwwwwwww.

19 April 2006

2007-04-19T23:19:00.000+08:00

This day last year yours truly was on her way to EUROPE!

2 days to a year

2007-04-17T20:03:00.000+08:00

It's two days to a year ago when we left for BSM and backpacking. Suddenly i wish i have the power to rewind time, just so i can be at the airport again with my huge ass luggage and backpack.

Someone told me time flieeesssss after you turn 21. Events become blurry memories, everything just whizzes past you. Looking back, its amazing how i survived the past year and how relationships changed with certain people. Some friends become further away while other are now closer to your heart.

This is a random post... i'm sick and tired of staring at my accounting notes. This semester is really too much accounting. 4 accounting modules instead of the usual 1/2 is already killing me. :( i dun even dare to think of what the exams will be like. oh well.

My girls!

2007-04-11T17:29:00.000+08:00

Pictures from the girls outing two fridays ago!

The Five Love Languages

2007-04-07T00:00:00.000+08:00

*I did this a while back. haha...out of pure boredom.

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Acts of Service.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		9
Acts of Service:		8
Physical Touch:		8
Receiving Gifts:		4
Words of Affirmation:		1

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

Happy Birthday Bear Bear!

2007-04-06T16:31:00.000+08:00

For the most important guy in my life...

Happy birthday baby! :)

Happy Birthday Phreaky!

2007-04-01T14:20:00.000+08:00

Especially for my very very special friend:

You have known me in good and bad times

You have seen me when i was happy and when i was sad

You have listened to me when what i said was intelligent and when i talked nonsense

You have been with me when we had fun and when we were miserable

You have watched me laugh and cry

You have understood me when i knew what i was doing and when i made mistakes

Thank you for believeing in me, for supporting me

and for always being reading to share thoughts together.

You are a perfect friend.

-Susan Polis Schutz

Happy Birthday Phreaky!

When visiting the wet market becomes an adventure

2007-03-20T13:43:00.000+08:00

Having no classes today, i decided to tag along with my grandma to the wet market just for fun.

Although i used to go marketing with her when i was much younger, the trip this morning was much more exciting! Mama was like in her own world when she's in the market...i've never seen her this way before. As though as shes in charge of a military operation... she knew exactly which stall to patron and who to approach to get what she needed in the fastest possible time. she knew almost everyone in the market! from stall owners to the other aunties marketing for their families. haha...it never dawned on me that she becomes so alive at the market...no wonder she loves going there.

Some of the stall owners even know who my parents and uncles are! hahah..unbelievable. I think neighbourhood wet markets have a crucial role in play in establishing the kampong spirit in housing estates. Just like it was raining heavily when we were done, and this kind stall owner offered us her brolly, nevermind that we willl only return it the next time we go marketing. nice huh!

I think schools should organise field trips to wet markets. Seriously! so that the kids actually know what a real chicken looks like and not take nuggets for the real thing. hehe...and wet markets are really quite exciting! the whole range of fish, vegetables, meat, chicken, yong tao fu, fruits, etc. Besides, there is so much action and life there!There's also this whole new social network with aunties exchanging cooking and health tips! So cute!

i just realised i sounded like i LOVE wet markets.

erm, lets just say wet markets once in a while is fine! I'm no home maker!

I miss you all!

2007-03-18T22:53:00.000+08:00

I dunno why, but these days i just keep thinking of the Europe days.

I miss
the european sun
the blooming flower fields we always pass when on the train
the lying on the grass just enjoying life
the non-stop gelato eating
the packing and unpacking as we eagerly settle down at our destination and move on to the next
the beers
the heart to heart talks about life
the photo - taking frenzy
the macdonalds that was "underground"
the "are we there yet?"
the laughter and smiles on everyone's faces
the boat rowing in the so many lakes
the pizzas
the tattered and torn maps
the long long long walks with our heavy backpacks
the very expensive tiramisu in Prague
the roses from my baby
the train journeys
the carefree days...

Most of all i miss the great people who made all the memories even more precious... yes we still see each other in school, but the feeling is different. Like even if we were to retrace our steps with the same pple again, the experience will never be the same. Thanks for being part of this very memorable part of my life!

I just wish i could remember all those moments forever and ever...

The Heisenberg Principle

2007-03-16T17:34:00.000+08:00

Heard this in my Accounting Theory class (dun ask me why physics principles are mentioned in an accounting class):

The more accurately you try to measure the speed of a particle, the less accurately you can measure its position

Prof said because of the simple fact that time and space are different continuum, every time we try to measure something, we disturb it.

The same principle applies in our lives too. Every time we attempt to weigh our relationships on a scale, we disturb it. Sometimes it might just be better to let things be and don't bother with the value of things...

I want the sun!

2007-03-15T14:07:00.000+08:00

It's the march hols for primary and secondary school kids this week, and they're having some soccer tournament at Bishan Park downstairs...

Watching those kids spend the afternoon engaging in sports really makes me feel like doing the same! It's been so many years since i last played a team sport and i really miss those days! the teamwork and adrenaline rushes, the horrible coach who's like from hell, the bitchy team mates, the daily morning 2km run, and most importantly, the ability to spend hours under the sun.

The sun has great healing powers...it has this amazing ability to make people feel instantly happier don't you think? I remember playing hockey under the freaking heat, but at the end of the day i also feel a lot happier than if i were to be working out in the gym. Even doing construction work under the sun in Thailand was enjoyable...

You know how people get seasonal depression during winter when the sun hardly shines? that just goes to show how important the sun is to the well being of us all.

I want to lie in the sun! i want to train with my team mates again under the heat!

I want I want I want to just soak up the sun!

i'm in the library!

2007-03-14T21:55:00.000+08:00

Its already 9:53pm and i'm still in the library! Out of boredom, i'm putting up photos of the babies of the family, my twin cousins! Cute rightttt?

of fairy tales and happy endings

2007-03-12T13:57:00.000+08:00

I attended SMU's band concert last night at the SCH and had a great time. Its been ages since i've been to a concert and i always enjoy band concerts.

There was this one particular piece i enjoyed, Fantillusion, which is a melody of Walt Disney's famous theme songs. As the band played, i could even picture the scenes from the various fairy tales, which just shows how much impact these fairy tales have on children.

So it got me thinking - what makes these stories so memorable and what makes them classics?
I think it has a lot to do with the notion of happy endings. Who does not like happy endings? i think we were conditioned since young to look for perfection in everything, so much so that anything thats not in the plan gets labelled as something negative.

But seriously, how often do we get happy endings? Life is just so unpredictable and i dare say that if anyone of us still believes in happy endings at this age, then this person is merely too sheltered to realise what and how life really is.

I don't actively look for happy endings for the simple fact that happy endings exist in fairy tales. I'm not saying that happy endings are entirely impossible, i'm just saying that its a rareity. I think its a lot more important to cherish what we have now than to keep searching for that illusive happy ending. :)

Happy monday everyone!

2007-03-09T16:08:00.000+08:00

Just downloaded Picasa. hehe :)

Memories from me Thailand days...

anyone still reading?

2007-03-09T14:52:00.000+08:00

its been such a long time since i last blogged, makes me kinda wonder if anyone out there is still reading this. :)

eh for those who asked me why i stopped blogging, you know the reason..hehe. but i've decided to make a comeback! i figured i need some form of outlet to release my thoughts and emotions.

updates updates!
I'm done with the internship with the Bank already! and they sort of offered me the chance to intern at their Hong Kong office. yipppeeee! hahaha..but it all hinges on whether i get my exchange to HK. Please let Hong Kong come my way! hahah..i need to get away from here and see new things! Zee is bored!

So with the internship out of my way, i'm back in school for modified term. Going back to school (as much as i love school) is a pain in the ass this semester because i am taking 4 ADVANCED ACCOUNTING modules. Sigh. The poor life of an accountant. I forsee many many academic readings and projects. For the first time in my time at SMU, i am going to need to write 4 exams! and the best part? I'm going to spend my birthday mugging for them. :(((((((

But on the brighter side, i am getting adjusted to school. I realised how much i miss seeing familiar faces as i navigate my way to classes, hanging out in the library and GSRs, hitting the gym to release all the pent-up frustrations, sitting in class and absorbing knowledge. It really feels good to be a student. I know i will miss all of it (including the ugly sides of it) when i graduate.

To all who are now in week 10, hang in there! :) Life now is a bitch, but we've all managed to survive previous sems, so this sem will be no different!

work!

2006-12-11T21:42:00.000+08:00

I started my internship at the bank today!!!!!

Its quite exciting actually, this thought of learning things and understanding the financial markets. I think i have heard the most number of "money markets", "FX", "Swaps", "Options", etc today. Its a whole new world to me and i hope i'll survive well there! :)

Anyway, while trying to distract from the big day that was approaching, i decided to look at my old blog last night. It certainly bought back lots of memories. Looking at those posts i really feel OLD. It was as if i had a lot more energy 2 years back, as if the world was more cheerful, and as if nothing seemed daunting. As i read through those posts punctuated with exclamation marks, words of encouragement to myself and friends, i really kind of wonder where this positive attitude went to.

I think this year has been a year of change for me. I changed and grew and matured as a person. This is the year that i think i thought the most about issues in life, faced my innermost fears and overcame them, and began to be more accepting of others' differences. I have asked so many questions about life and where i'm going in the future, and tried to get answers out of so many people. I guess in the end its all about knowing ourselves better and coming to terms with the face we see in the mirror. Nothing beats being able to live with ourselves and our decisions. Thats what i call the inner peace. :)

I want to thank my boyfriend and all my friends for being there with me during these trying times. Thank you for allowing me to search for my true self, thank you for your encouragement and words of wisom (zhen yans) and thank you for simply being who you are! :) I will never be who i am without you guys.

For old times' sake

2006-11-14T21:54:00.000+08:00

I know i'm supposed to be studying...but somehow i ended up looking at old photos...

For all the good times in the past and more to come! :)

11 Oct 2005 - Back to St Nicks!

13 Sept 2005 - Cafe Iguana with Gourmet Club!

21 Sept 2005 - SMU Arts Fest

4 Dec 2005 - Secret Garden
4 Dec 2005 - Secret Garden
7 Dec 2005 - Timbre!
7 Dec 2005 - Timbre! My Meow Meow girls!

project madness!!

2006-11-02T23:37:00.000+08:00

I love my school. Because it brings out the wierd streaks in all my friends. Staying in school till late late really helps me to see the other side of the pple around me. It's quite enjoyable actually, because it reminds me of those days in St nicks, where we'll all just stay behind in school to prepare for some event or other, and we'll all just end up being really giggly by 12 midnight. and all the wierd things start to happen.

It's your attitude, not aptitude that will determine your altitude in life.
(from my FT class)

It's all about what we make out of things. When things get tough, i guess its how we choose to see the lighter side of things that really matters. :)

so my dear friends, the next few weeks are going to get worse. But i know we all have what it takes to get through it and emerge with smiling faces. Its the altitude that matters!

2006-10-27T21:05:00.000+08:00

It's times like this that i miss soooo much, especially when the project madness goes into full swing, fuses become shorter and when all that's on my mind are memories of these:

The Rope

2006-09-15T10:36:00.000+08:00

Came across this while reading Nick Hornby's A Long Way Down last night:

Most people have a rope that ties them to someone, and that rope can be short or it can be long. You don't know how long, though. It's not your choice. Maureen's rope ties her to Matty (her disabled son) and its about six inches long and it's killing her. Martin's rope ties him to his daughters, and, like a stupid dog, he thinks it isn't there. He goes running off somewhere,..., and then suddenly it brings him up short and chokes him and he acts surprised, and then he does the same thing again the next day.

Do you have a rope tied to someone? I think most of us do.

Some of us have ropes tied around ourselves and we spend half the time trying to disentangle ourselves from it.

Some have ropes tied to people from the past - people who obviously have cut their end of the rope, but we think its still attached to them.

Some have ropes tied to people living far far away and sometimes wonder if the other person is still holding on faithfully to the other end.

Some hold on too tightly to the rope, drawing the other person so near that it's suffocating the both of them.

Which kind do you belong to?

Living

2006-09-10T10:58:00.001+08:00

I don't think its very easy living in a society like ours.

There's something about it that leaves us all jaded at the end of the day. We are no longer sure if what we're doing is what we really want. We become so lost in this city of anonymity.

I think it's important to know what you want in life and to fight for it. I don't want to become one of the many soul-less people just drifting around in the vast sea. I don't want to be one of those who live life day by day, with nothing to look forward to and with nothing to be proud of. I want to die saying that i've lived my life and i've enjoyed the entire journey. :)

I don't understand how some people can lead their lives without questioning their very existance. If anything, i think the greatest thing that sets us apart from animals is our ability to think.

Maybe they are the smarter ones, because not thinking and not questioning makes life a whole lot easier. Why think and question so much when you know that there's nothing you can do to change anything right? Why bother yourself with things like these when you could be happy in your own little well?

I believe the day i stop pondering about the meaning of life is the day i stop living it.

We all think about things at one point in our lives or another, don't we? I just can't see how anyone can skip this phase. Maybe its a St Nicks thing - we were exposed to a lot more at such a young age and it forces us to think and fight for what we want. I think it's hard to find one of us who can't tell you what she wants in life. We're a whole lot deeper and harder to grasp than many other people i suppose.

I think, therefore i am.

2006-08-29T20:55:00.000+08:00

Being so busy these days is forcing me to rank people and things around me.

Can it wait? Can wait then let me get done with the more important things first.
How important is it? More important than what's currently in the queue? Then i'll let it jump the queue.

Its funny how when you're so busy, you just want to spend all the time you have left with people that matters. Nowadays i have this urge to get home as quickly as i can, so i can spend more time at home with my family. Gone are the days of wasting my time hanging around school doing mindless things after class. Gone are the days of "Lets go out cause i feel like it!".

No wonder they say when you are presented with the lack of time, you are at a better position to stop and take stock of your life so far and wonder if you've spent your time doing the right things with the right people.

The order of things

2006-08-03T22:38:00.000+08:00

Something I came across while reading Nick Hornby's A Long Way Down, which touches on the topic of suicide. Here goes:

What is the biggest sin of all? All your life you're told that you'll be going to this marvellous place when you pass on. And the one thing that you can do to get you there a bit quicker is something that stops you from getting there at all. Oh, i can see that it's a kind of queue-jumping. But if someone jumps the queue at the Post Office, people tut. Or sometimes they say, "Excuse me, I was here first." They don't say, " You will be consumed by hellfire for all eternity.".

Reading it made me think about fate and the order of things in our life. Are we all meant to follow a path that was mapped out by someone above? Does it mean that anything we do to deviate from the path will put things out of balance? Is that why we meet certain people during different periods of our lifes? Can that explain why some people stay on to mean so much to us while others simply fade away?

I used to ( and still do) think that everything happens for a reason. Everyone in your life is there to teach you something. Even people you dun really like appear in your life to convey a certain message. Do you call that fate? Do you really think that somewhere out there lies a blueprint for each and every one of us?

when love becomes...

2006-07-26T00:03:00.000+08:00

How would you pick up the pieces after a relationship has ended?

Would it hurt to just look at the photos?
Would it be too painful to go back to the places that used to be your hang outs?
Would seeing some things remind you of the good times you've had together?

Is it because you miss the other person so much that it hurts? or is it because you hate the other party so much?

Why is it that when a relationship has ended people find it so hard to let go?
Why do they still keep photos of happy moments in their wallets and phones, and in well hidden albums that only they can find.
Why can't they bear to throw out gifts or anything else that reminds them of the relationship?
Why do they talk about their ex-es as if they were objects and not perons?
Are they running away from reality?

What happens when love turns into hatred?

2006-07-22T13:36:00.000+08:00

This made me think of how fast time flies . It flies past so quickly that everything becomes a blur.

I think about the past ten years of my life and i wonder how people and things have changed. It feels as though as i've experienced so many things in that space of time that everything is just compressed into a messy pile of blurred memories.

It seems that you older you become, the faster time passes. Maybe its because you've got more activities going on as you get older, maybe its because you're trying so hard to find time for everyone important in your life. Speaking of which, i really do not understand how you can find time. Time is not something that is waiting to be found, rather it ticks on regardless of who and where you are. Time is the only commodity that we all have equal amounts of, regardless of your age, wealth, etc. Imagine what it would be like if we could trade time - like go to a bank and get a loan of time instead of money. Imagine whats going to happen if money could indeed buy time.

Maybe we are getting too smart for our own good, coming up with inventions and systems that are supposed to save time and improve efficiency. Isn't it all a vicious cycle? The more time we have on our hands, the more things we try to squeeze into our lives, and the end result is just an incomplete experience of things because we have to rush from one thing to another. Why is everyone rushing to somewhere? Don't we all have the same end point in life?

There are times when i feel torn because spending more time doing something or with someone means you are spending less time with someone else. Its like a pie, no matter how you slice it, the pie will never ever grow bigger. You may say that its all about making and finding time, but doing that would probably mean turning everything into blurred memories because you are not spending time properly with either parties.

And the worse part is that everyone moves on, whether you are in their lives or not. No one ever waits or even have the time to update you on what has happened. People carry on living their lives because time doesn't wait. We all have friends who moved on so fast that we can't even recognise them anymore, don't we? Was it our fault for not being there when they moved on because we never had the time for them?

I saw that picture while sorting out my backpacking photos. Looking through all those pictures made me think about how fast time flies when you're having fun, and i'm just so worried that as time passes, all those good memories would become nothing more than a stack of old photographs.....

issues - yours and mine

2006-07-03T21:45:00.000+08:00

Everyone has issues.

Even the most simple minded person has issues to deal with.

Everyone around me seems to be very bothered by one thing or the other these days. What happened to the good times when we all could just sit down and laugh about nothing? Since when have we become so affected by the actions and feelings of other people? Since when did we begin to care so much about how others judge us?

Maybe we should just learn to compartmentalise our feelings. When at work, think only about work. When hanging out with friends, think only about them and nothing else. If only it's as easy as it sounds. :(

I just feel so sad when i see friends upset about some things and there's nothing i can do to help them. Yes i can listen, but that's about all that i can do. Sometimes you just dunno what to say because if you say what's really on your mind you might hurt their feelings. And it doesn't help that i have issues of my own too... which doesn't really seem like an issue anymore when you listen to what's bothering them. Then you start asking yourself if you're just making a mountain out of a molehill because your problem pales in comparison when you listen to your friends talk about theirs.

SIGHHHHHHHHH

Augsburg + Fuessen!!!!

2006-07-02T22:00:00.000+08:00

Life as an accountant really can get rather sad. I think sooner or later i am going to become numeric phobic, because i stare at figures for 8 hours a day 5 days a week. If i have to look at numbers anymore i might have to puke. :(

Anyway on a brighter note, more photos!

Augsburg! The little town where Mabel's uncle lives and where we spent 1 night before moving on to Fuessen.
Lucky duckling Mabel's got her own apartment! In fact she's got the entire basement to herself, complete with living room, bedroom, kitchen and bathroom. How shiokkkkk. Not to mention cable TV with more than a 100 channels.

This was breakfast at her Auntie's place, which was on the 2nd floor. I love the way the Europeans have these L shaped sofas/benches. so cosy and space efficient! I am going to make sure i have something like this in my own house. :) And its so cool the way they have 3 generations living in the same house. Mabel's auntie and uncle stay on the highest level, one floor down stays their parents, and the basement is a guest apartment. Its like having your own space without ever having to move out. Like if i dun want to see my parents then i just run up to the 2nd floor and come home to my own space. Or if i feel like being a little kid then i can just go down to mummy's place for dinner and TV. Best of both worlds right? hee.

After breakfast (which consisted of loads of ham, cheese and bread), we took a 1 hour plus train ride to Fuessen - the place where the famous Neuschwanstein Castle is located. Located in southern Germany, Fuessen has an excellent view of the Bavarian Alps. See how nice it looks...I would love to have a view like this from my bedroom window.

I love this picture!

siao ding dong friends in the group..hehe.

The famous Schloss Neuschwanstein! Looks familiar right? thats because Walt Disney modelled his logo after this castle! :) We did not go in for the guided tour, because we heard that its not worth the long wait and the scenery alone is worth the hike up. Have i mentioned the hike up to the castle? wah liao ehhhhh....damn a lot of slopes and inclines. and DAMN a lot of horse poo. very very smelly horses too. We were all so tempted to just run up those steep steep slopes and then roll down to make life easier. haha...

Its been more than a month since i've been back...and i REALLY REALLY am still thinking of Europe all the time. I need to get back to reality and stop thinking of those good times. sighhhhh

Englischer Garten + Olympia Park

2006-06-22T21:02:00.000+08:00

As promised, photos taken on the trip! :)

Larger than New York's Central Park, the Englischer Garten is almost like a piece of paradise away from the hustle and bustle of Marienplatz (Munich's famous shopping square). I was sooo glad we went to this park. To see the locals jogging, cycling, taking walks, drinking beer, frolicking in the grass was exactly what i needed after BSM - some tranquility.

I think this picture is damn sweet! I guess this is what we all dream of deep down in our hearts - to hold hands with the right one for the rest of our lives and walk the long and winding road together. :)

Seah gek and I!!!!! contrast the layers and thickness of our jackets! hehe....

Paddling in the lake! Something we could never do in Singapore! see how me and Zhirui were at Seah gek's service..... :)

After spending the afternoon at the Englischer Garten, we walked and walked and walked to the Olympia Park. This day will go down in ah zee zee's history as the day she walked soo much without hiam-ing. Of course i have a nice boyfriend who's willing to carry my pink sling bag. hee...

Olympia Park...the venue for the 1972 Olympics! see how the architecture resembles a spider web...It apparently has the largest roof in the world and is able to collect rainwater which is used to fill up the adjacent lakes.

Us at the olympia park! :)

These were all the photos of 30 April, before we departed to Augsburg in the evening... more photos coming up!

word vormit

2006-06-17T13:26:00.000+08:00

I think i am going to dedicate this post to word vormitting.

There are so many things on my mind right now, so much that i have absolutely no idea where to start.

It has been about 3 weeks since i've returned from Europe and i am (like seah gek says) experiencing the Europe withdrawal syndrome. somebody helppppppp...... Everytime i look at the photos we took in Europe, i can't help but think of how much fun and laughter we have had, and how those days will never ever come again. Even if i were to go back to Europe, i will most probably not be in the company of the same friends. Just thinking of this makes me regret not treasuring those times even more. But like they always say, nothing lasts forever. The fact that i had the opportunity to have such great times with this bunch of people should be something to celebrate. Maybe its time we all learn to live every moment like we're going to die soon, cause thats the only way we will truly savour the experience. :)

Sometimes i think the reason why we all are suffering from the Europe withdrawal sydnrome could be because Europe offered an opportunity for us to escape from reality. The reality where we have responsibilities and people to answer to and roles to play, the reality where we could never pretend the past never existed because it comes back to haunt us, the reality where its hard to ignore problems exist.

I guess it was only in Europe where we could be the persons we truly wanted to be. For a few weeks we did not have to worry about what was going on in the real world, and i think what i saw in my travelling companions during those weeks were what they would have been in reality if they truly had a choice. If only there were no social norms in reality, if only there were lesser complications in the real world, if only there were fewer consequences in reality, I think we will all live life being a little more true to ourselves.

Sometimes i wonder about how we tend to lead our lives for other people. How many of those decisions we made were really ours? How true are we to ourselves? How many times did we jump into something just because our friends were doing it? Why were we not brave enough to take a different route to get what we really want? But then again, do we know what we even want and what makes us happy?

If only we would live in lala land forever, then the world would be such a nice place. There will be no more cynics and skeptics and life will really be a bed of roses. How i wish time stands still when we are having fun, that way i can live in those 5 weeks in Europe forever. Either that, or someone should invent a way for us to step into our memeories and experience them all over again when we feel like it. That would make me very very happy.

Maybe its because we are now at an age where we can no longer pretend we have no responsibilities, thats why we're so happy to run away to lala land.It's so easy to ignore them when you were 18 and say you will deal with it when you grow up. And before you know it, you're all grown up and have no choice but to deal with them before people label you as unfeeling and irresponsible. I really wonder how our parents dealt with all these without wanting to run away. I don't want to grow upppppppp.

Will post photos next!